INCENSED INBOX

[counterattack]

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[rinwell]

I'm still a bit sore. But I'm getting better.

What about you?

[counterattack]

[ an S appears, then gets scratched out. ]

i'm ok. i didn't have any lasting injuries.

[ or they got noped when he respawned, but whatever. eventually the S makes a reappearance. ]

sorry

[rinwell]

That's good.

I don't either. I hope

[ There's a bit of a pause when she sees the S appear, and the word eventually finish. ]

I'm sorry too.

[counterattack]

what about your arm? and hootle?

[ all he really remembers there is an explosion of feathers, so... ]

you didn't do anything.

[rinwell]

It's healing up okay! The healers said there won't even be scars, so long as I keep applying that gross black gunk they like so much.

Hootle's [a pause. a really long pause] okay? Well. He's still working through some changes. But he's okay.





You're right. I didn't. I didn't help you. I didn't break you out of the incense, like you did for me, no matter what I said or tried. So...I'm sorry.

[counterattack]

i don't remember what he changed into. i just remember trying to eat him.

[ or whatever he was doing. "eat" is the wrong word, but it's the only verb he can come up with for "open mouth, insert bird" right now. there's also a really long pause before he writes any sort of response underneath the second part, either. ]

that's not what i meant and you know it. there wasn't anything you could do anyway. only one thing was ever going to stop me once i got that bad.

[rinwell]

He's got four legs now.

That doesn't stop me being sorry that I couldn't DO anything! I tried! And it didn't work!

[ And that's. That's not really helping, even if it is partially why she reached out.

She takes a breath, and tries switching tact. ]

I know what you meant. But, you know that wasn't your fault, right? I don't hold what happened against you.

[counterattack]

oh, that was real

[ well, that's one weird hallucination he has an answer for. ]

it's ok, rinwell. you tried, i
you should've just run, but i appreciate it. i'm sorry i couldn't listen.

you talked to alphen already?

[rinwell]

Yeah..They haven't gone away yet. And his tail changed, too. I'll show you when I find you.

The incense is awful. And it's not your fault it overwhelmed you. Maybe if I'd

I haven't yet, I wanted to talk to you first. I couldn't help him, eith

[counterattack]

oh

[ honey, you've got a big storm comin' ]

i don't know if
i just
i haven't really seen anybody except him since i got here. i don't really know how to face
what i did

[rinwell]

Law..

Was

Was it really that bad, after I left you?

And

You don't have to face it, if you're not ready yet. But you don't have to face it alone, when you are.

[counterattack]

i did a lot of things before and after. a lot of people got hurt or died because of me. i can't accept that it's the incense's fault, that never sat right with me any other time
but now

i don't know.

[rinwell]

[ She lets that sit for a minute or two. Because...well, what do you say to that? It's hard to argue that logic, that point of view. Even when you know in your heart that it's not right at all. She bites her lip, thinking, before her graphite stick starts writing again. ]

I

I know how that feels. And I know..that's not who you really are. That's why it hurts you so much.

But the incense changes everything. It warps our vision, our minds. Can you really say you had a choice in your actions, when everything around you was made into a lie? I know I can't say that.

[counterattack]

but what if it is?
rinwell why do i always go back to cysloden when this happens? why is it always the snake eyes? why am i always one of them? why do i look like that when i turn into a monster?
maybe i'm just not actually any better than that. deep down.

you know what they're like more than any of the others. they lie and backstab so much they even start to believe it all themselves.
if i could turn on you and the others like that again and again then maybe i've just been lying to myself. maybe when i lash out, that's the real truth.
i can't stand it, i can't put anyone else through that

[rinwell]

Don't.

Don't say that. It's not true at all!

The Snake Eyes were created by the Renans. By Ganabelt! To manipulate and lie and make people suffer.

And maybe not all Renans were like Ganabelt, we know that because of Shionne and Dohalim. But enough were like that, like the soldiers that enslaved Calaglians. That made Cyslodians work the lights. That made Menancians toil endlessly in their mines, before their Lord changed. And you weren't given a choice to join, not really.

You did what you had to to survive in the Snake Eyes, Law. And you've worked so hard to stand up for the right thing since you cast that off.

Do you think I'm a monster because I had have magic?

[counterattack]

but then why

what?? no! why would i?

[rinwell]

Then why would I think you're a monster? Because your body changed on you?

[counterattack]

you never used your magic to hurt anyone who didn't deserve it. you never used it to scare people, or to force them to do things they didn't want to do. it's different.

[rinwell]

No, it's not! If you really were a monster, then none of what happened would bother you. You wouldn't feel regret or hurt, or mourn. I know you. You would NEVER do any of those things without any other choice available to you.

The incense gave you no choice. It's never given anyone any choices before, and it didn't in Tikal once the earthquakes started and that awful laughter began.

[counterattack]

that's not a good enough excuse this time! i can't accept that.

[rinwell]

How is it an excuse?! It's the truth!

[counterattack]

i can't just keep saying that every time i do something wrong! and i'm not getting any better at controlling it, i'm getting WORSE.

[rinwell]

Since when has anything been controllable when the incense is involved?


[ There's a smudge, a scribble. A starting letter scrubbed out. Then: ]

So, what do you want to do?

[counterattack]

not everybody loses their minds and attacks people. there's a way.

do?
i don't know... what are you doing?

[rinwell]

Given almost everyone I met in Tikal attacked me when under the influence of the incense, my experience doesn't agree with you.

I

I'm looking at maps.