A LAWFUL WASTELAND

[counterattack]

[ it's December 8. Law turns 18 today. at this point, he's been living in Copalli for over a year. during the final relic fiasco, he achieved trance within about five seconds (because it's basically overlimit) and faced Tiamat in her castle because he had a score to settle with dragons (dragons, wyverns, same shit) and had enough taking shit from these mother fucking guardians in this mother fucking jungle. it was epic.

anyway, it's a few months later and Law lives in Tikal again, down at the bottom of the crater. they've built bridges and pulleys aboveground, as well as created a system to keep the crater from filling with water when it rains. although most of his farm was lost during Tikal's fall, he's rebuilt it bigger and better than ever and repopulated it with even more chickens, hogs, cows and even a few semi-domesticated mist monsters. there's also proper crops, probably due in part to at least one friend or another planting on the huge expanse of land he's set up there. he also rebuilt the inn that collapsed on top of him back then, and this time it's actually finished. he got a local business manager to help run the place and they export animal products and crops all over Copalli. the inn is booming. it's great.

all is well.

except now it's his birthday and Law is just trying to go about his business like he doesn't know that, strapping on his fancy wolf gauntlets and shouldering a big pack of supplies to go make some delivery trips to the other cities. nothin' to see here, not ya lil dude all growed up, a solid 5'9" (and a half) with some cool tribal tats done over his wyvern scars and something of a more mature countenance, buuuuuttt still the dweebo dorkus doofus meathead he's always been.

ANYWAY, THIS IS #LATERGRAM INCENSEDVERSE. medallion him, meet him at any of the cities, fight monsters together on the road, pretend there was a party planned that he's trying to sneak out of showing up to, WHATEVER WORKS. ]

Comments

[counterattack]

[ it shouldn't be so easy to sneak up on him, but Law has distractions to keep him busy, and he's not really expecting to run into anyone he knows and hasn't already heard from today. he's in Coba dropping off stuff from the farm, and the time he spends talking back and forth with someone at a market stall, handing off bundles of corn and packages of eggs, and then going around in circles on payment should give Gladio plenty of time to pull a fast one. ]

No, seriously, I don't need extra. Just keep it! It's fine. See ya later!

[ not even two steps. not even two steps and suddenly he's captured and dragged a few paces back. he lets go of his travel back to immediately grab hold of the arm around his neck, so it's a really good thing he already offloaded those eggs, otherwise it'd be a real catastrophe. it's just lucky the noogie comes before Law can sweep the leg and break his hold. his reflexes are wayyyy faster than his brain is. ]

Nghgghhh, cut that out! Gah—Gladio?! C'mon, stoooop!

[ and as soon as he gets free, of course the first thing he does is fix his hair. it's really growing out. he's almost got enough for a teeny tiny ponytail in the back. ]

What, were you lookin' for me or something?

[indeferent]

_{[ two. that's all it takes for Gladio to cinch his hold that much tighter so he can finish off the noogie properly with an extra tussle of hair and its with a snort that he "reluctantly" lets the kid break free. free, but not out of range because as soon as he sets to fussing with the mess he'd made, Gladio (gently) knocks his hip into the other. ]}

What, like it's hard? I can see that tail of yours from a mile away.

_{[ says the one who has a pair of purple, fuzzy behemoth-esque ears and the equally lethal set of horns to go with them. neither of them do a very good job of blending in all things considered but hey. details, right? ]}

But yeah, I kinda was. You busy?

[counterattack]

Leave my tail outta this.

[ pas possible. his tail is very prominent. the tail has grown proportional to the rest of him, and has remained just as immensely fluffy as well. he isn't quite as overly self-conscious about it now that he's had awhile to get used to it, but he still gives it a flick to hide it behind himself anyway.

Gladio bumps him, and Law bumps him back, then bends down to pick his mostly-empty bag up off the ground. nothing fell out of it, partly because there's little more than his map, compass, and a few other survival supplies left in there in the first place. he seems surprised to hear he was actually sought after, but it's hard to say if that's willful or genuine ignorance. ]

Nah, I just got finished here. I was gonna hit up Viento's before I leave. You, uh... need some help with something?

[indeferent]

_{[ his only response is another snort and a half-assed grab for the tail - whether he misses or not doesn't really matter. there'll be plenty of opportunities for a proper Grab-n-Yank and none of those are out in the streets where the entire population of Copalli can see, no matter how tempting it is. one ear flicks in thought, brows furrowing for a moment before he shakes his head once. ]}

Nah. Well... Unless you wanna celebrate? I got somethin' pretty special from the statue. Viento's might be a good place to bust it open, 'specially before Princess and the others catch wind of it.

_{[ only they probably? wouldn't? at least not before Law has had a chance to get his hands on it. ]}

Figure it's a good time to return the favor from earlier this year.

[counterattack]

[ "celebrate" has him straightening his shoulders suspiciously, but he's very careful not to narrow his eyes like He Knows. okay, so yeah, he is intentionally playing stupid. for no real reason, it's just weird to draw attention to it, y'know? even after last year—maybe even because of last year, and the subsequent series of unfortunate events that came after, it just doesn't feel right to mention it. he's got a pinata he made out of clay at home waiting for him, just so he can observe Calaglian tradition, but other than that...... (eyes except suspicious) ]

Wait, which favor? What'd you get? Something from home?

[ it'd probably have to be, if it came from the statue. Law chooses to assume this is not Specifically For Him even though all signs point to the contrary and just goes on acting like he doesn't know nothin' about nothin'. good ol' Cyslodian sensibilities. they're good for (absolutely nothing) something, sometimes. ]

Uh—yeah, you wanna go check it out over drinks? I'll buy.

[indeferent]

A couple things, yeah. It was another thing of "try it and see what happens" and, well...

<sub>[ Gladio shifts to show off the bag - relatively nondescript and looking more like the kind one might take on a short trip into the woods or to another city, but definitely full of something or another. when he swings it back over it even crinkles but beyond that? it's totally normal. no secret contraband or plots in it whatsoever. hell, the only thing that stands out to Gladio's own (relatively new, cursed) sense of smell is it's something that was distinctly Insomnian. something familiar.

something that risks pulling at his heartstrings if he thinks too much about it which will no doubt inevitably happen once he opens it up at Viento's. ]</sub>

First round is on me. After that? Go nuts, so long as I get to pay for the food. Though... we'll probably wanna get an actual table instead of sittin' at the bar this time around. I wouldn't want an entire bag getting dumped out across my workspace if I were them, you know?

[counterattack]

[ Law hasn't had his senses sharpened just yet, sadly, although he's long overdue for those dog-ears and one of these days he's gonna wake up with them, too. in the meantime, although he studies that bag to the best of his ability, he can't guess what it might be. something from Gladio's home could be literally anything, probably well outside the realm of his limited imagination. how do you even guess at things from another world? and even though this is all, as the kids say, kinda sus, he can't help how instantly his curiosity is piqued. ]

Yeah, guess you're right.

[ it's a lot harder to get embarrassed in public at a table, too. he darts his searching gaze up from the bag to Gladio's face, then makes a good show of shrugging it off and gesturing with a nod of his head before he starts off toward Viento. inside, they get their table, their first round of paint thinner—uhh, drinks i mean—and an order put in for some of those crispy veggie sticks that could kinda pass for healthy fries if you pretend really hard, in short order. Law makes sure to pick a corner table and then sit with his back to the wall, facing the entrance, juuuust in case.

like, if this is gonna turn into some big thing, he wants to see it coming so he can react accordingly (by doing absolutely nothing, since the attention is secretly really, y'know, kind of nice). anyway, he gulps his shot like it's water and tries to be Super Extra Casual about what comes next: ]

Sooo... whad'ja get?

[indeferent]

Somethin' I got a couple years ago from some crazy guys where I worked. And my old man. Sorta.

<sub>[ no matter how many times he's had the same alcohol it never fails to make him grimace. it's strong and makes his mouth numb just like the hardest stuff that his father had in his liquor cabinet for special occasions, but it lacks the spice that marked it for what it was; centuries-old Lucian booze that likely cost a small fortune in Gladio's day and age. he'd only had it twice himself throughout his lifetime, too. once when he'd officially became Noct's shield, and once before when he was in Law's own position.

sure, the kid never really advertised or spoke about it but that's just the thing - Gladio listens, and he listens to people talk. a couple questions here and there, even to the kid's own father, and... well, look.

Gladio raises a brow and after a moment or three he hefts the bag up onto his lap, moves his empty glass out of the way, and pulls out a dark, plain-looking bottle with an intricate label on it to take its place on the table. then he tips the rest of the bag over and out comes a variety of nothing but pure junkfood and cans from vending machines and gas stations. ]</sub>

You gave me a taste of what you got where you come from on mine. It's only right I try and give you a taste of what came from mine on yours.

_{[ he knows. ]}

I'd take you to the greasiest joint Insomnia has to offer if I could, but... I'm hoping this'll make up for it. Just go easy on the orange bag - it's genuine Galahdian shit, so it might be on the hotter side.

[counterattack]

Whoa.

[ Law forgets to be all worked up about what day it is and is immediately impressed by the sheer volume of garbage food. there's a lot of it, yeah, but it's also just really exciting to his caveman eyes, who have never seen basic things like shiny plastic bags with neat colors and designs and stuff that contain chips. it's just plain exciting to look at, like each is a wrapped gift all on its own. he can't read anything that's on any of them, but some of that is taken care of for him by having, like, cartoon dancing potatoes or pictures of what's in it right on the packaging, not that that does the complete job of telling him what a lot of it is. even the bottle is kind of a mystery to him.

at the end of the day, no matter how much things change and how long he's lived here in Copalli, he's not sure he's ever going to get used to seeing a whole shitton of food in front of him like this. you don't spend your life starving and basically willing to kill someone for the crumbs under their fingernails and not get blown away by a pile of free junk food. ]

Wh...what even is all this? I didn't even give you that much!

[ on an even trade basis, he considers it incomparable. disbelieving, he looks from the mountain of snacks to Gladio's face, all of that grown-up-tough-guy-been-through-some-shit countenance gone, so that he's nothing but an impressionable kid again. ]

I can't take all of this, that's crazy.

[indeferent]

_{[ stifling his snort of laughter is pretty much impossible so he lets it rip out right along with a wolfish grin to match. he can't say he's been in Law's position before—no, actually, that's a lie because there had been that noodles exhibition that Nyx had dragged him to as a joke and he's pretty sure he wore the exact same look on his own face. the memory of it makes his ears warm, and Gladio nudges a few of the bags across the table in a silent go ahead. ]}

Then grab whatever looks interesting. Or try everything, and I'll bring the rest back to Kiichpan. They won't last long enough to risk going bad either way between all of us.

_{[ he knows Noct would descend upon it like a ravenous sabertusk and that's not even taking the others into account. after some thought he reaches into the pile and retrieves a little package of some sort of cake with stripes on it, then tosses it towards his chest. ]}

You want my advice? Try the Garula cakes. I know it sounds a little unappetizing but they're addictive, I swear. Iris used to make me buy 'em all the time when I'd go to the convenience store a couple blocks away my place. And these—

_{[ a tap to a black bag with a funky looking malboro holding a... pizza of some sort above its head in its little tentacles. nobody better diss Li'l Malbuddy, okay? it does its best and that's all anyone can ever ask for. ]}

You only turn eighteen once, right? Treat yourself and go wild.

[counterattack]

[ And there it is. Law's expression flattens out a little, but it's not like he's actually all that upset about it. And he knew it was coming. He totally knew. ]

Ugh... I didn't tell you when it was, did I? Actually—maybe I did, I dunno. Or somebody ratted. Anyways... I guess, yeah. Thanks.

[ It's a good thing Gladio gives him a suggestion, otherwise he wouldn't even know where to start. In theory, he's perfectly happy to rip open every bag and pop every top to taste a little of everything, but even then—where to start?! He catches the packet and turns it over in his hands a few times, studying it. Looks like something Rinwell would probably lose her mind over, and it's a cake? Yeah, he's gonna have to save one of these for her. Once he picks apart the flimsy plastic and peels it away, he takes a bite.

Oh, Astrals. His eyes squint. Is this baby's first encounter with high fructose corn syrup and artificial sugars? It might be. Just talking with his mouth full, nbd: ]

Auuuugghhhh... it's so sweet...

[ yeeeep, Rinwell would claw his eyes out for a taste of this. Just gonna save the rest of this for her. ]

On the upside, Rinwell would kill for this, but on the other hand, it's so sugary she'll probably go into withdrawals when there isn't any more of it. Maybe it's a chick thing?

[ as if dudes can't like sweets. anyway, Malbuddy looks badass, he's going for that next. ]

[indeferent]

I asked around. I, er... I wanted to do something for it and I wasn't sure if I'd missed it while everything was fucked up, but I didn't see anything written in the journals so I figured I still had time. It was just a matter of finding out when, you know?

<sub>[ and it wasn't as if he could just go ask - except he really actually could've - lest Law think he was planning something big and over the top. maybe if Gladio could've gotten him back on Eos, sure, but here? he had to improvise a little, and... sometimes huge parties aren't all that. he always preferred smaller, more intimate ones with the people he cared about versus the Big Fancy Ones that came with nobility, and given Law's own upbringing he figured that he might be the same.

when Law makes for the bag of chips, Gladio reaches across to catch his chin for a split second. just long enough to swipe away a couple crumbs and the tiniest spattering of frosting left behind, but he still does it. ]</sub>

I dunno if it's strictly a chick thing, though. My dad had a sweet tooth and so does my, uh... guess you'd call him my godfather? He's got one too even if he won't admit it.

_{[ if his hand lingers a little longer than it ought to have, Gladio doesn't draw any attention to it. he withdraws and instead reaches for Law's empty glass next to pull it over to his side of the table along with his own, and slides them next to the bottle. the best for last, as always. no point in drinking on an empty stomach, right? even if it's junk food. ]}

Maybe I should've asked for the ones they sold during solstice if it's that sweet, huh? Those ones were always more mild.

[counterattack]

It's not like it's a secret, I just—

[ He Just. Whatever he just is summarily forgotten the moment Gladio reaches for his face. Law's not so jumpy that his first inclination is to flinch or pull back, which turns out to be his downfall. Color rushes to his cheeks before Gladio's thumb has even finished its pass across the corner of his mouth, and as much as he wants to be indignant and pull a stoooop maneuver, he just can't seem to work his way up to it. Instead, he makes a choked sound in the back of his throat and sits there looking like a dork even after his face has been released. ]

...Uh.

[ what was he saying ]

...I just, uh... uhh... [ FUCK ] Y'know what, never mind, doesn't matter. I-It's not a big deal. The— the sweets, I mean. I don't mind them, they're just not my favorite. Never had anything that sweet before, though. Hey, you said you got that bottle from your dad, right?

[ One has to assume it's liquor, or something, and Law has to assume he'll be able to put it away just like the straight gasoline they call drinks here, too. Evidently, he inherited some "tastebuds are basically rocks, just like the brains" gene from one or both parents, but maybe if he drinks something with actual, y'know, flavor? Guess we'll find out. In the meantime, he has such a time opening the chip bag that he ends up ripping it in half and exploding chips all over the table. His eyes widen, briefly jarred, but... yeah, he sure is eighteen. That shit is funny. ]

Hehe... whoops.

[indeferent]

_{[ both of Gladio's furry ears sit at attention the entire time Law tries to explain it. it's almost comical when he winds up tilting his head in the process, both brows slightly raised as he tries to fully comprehend what he means. or maybe it's his own way of teasing with a silent way of saying "yeah? and? go on" for a few moments. whatever the reason, he's focused. he's attentive. he's listening, even when he goes a little too hard on the bag and sends the orange-dusted chips flying onto the table and in their faces. he even manages to catch one or two before they fall into his lap and those go right into his mouth with a quiet laugh. ]}

There's a first time for everything, huh? But, uh... Y-Yeah, sort of.

_{[ his eyes drop back to the bottle and if he really tries he can imagine parts of the label worn down by his father's thumb tracing the letters on it. the yellow tint. if a bottle could speak... six, the stories it could tell. ]}

Technically I only got a shot from this back home. S'really old and dad kept it for special occasions but I guess it just decided to drop the whole bottle in since delivering one might've been a stretch.

[counterattack]

[ Law goes in on those chips as he listens, and these absolutely hit home. You know how fast those things are gonna disappear into the bottomless, gaping pit of his stomach? Lightning fast. He doesn't even realize he's doing it, going full cookie monster mode while he nods and looks attentive. that MSG is like crack, man. ]

Geez... you sure it's okay to have something like that? This isn't really a "special occasion. " I mean—like, a major one.

[ Sure, birthdays are great and all, and yeah, after everything he's been through it's basically nothing short of a miracle that he's made it to an actually sort of adult age (never saw that coming, tbh), but "bust out your dad's fancy liquor" levels of momentous? Eh. That's probably just his bias talking, though. And he doesn't even know about Gladio and his dad! If he did, maybe he wouldn't be unceremoniously stuffing his hamster cheeks, he'd take it more seriously. Over a year in this place and frankly, the Dad Angst has only gotten more complicated. Then you add to that all the things he's seen his friends go through, the times they've been a lot less fortunate than him, things like that... yeah, he doesn't have any business not being solemn about that kind of thing. ]

[indeferent]

What's he gonna do? Ground me?

<sub>[ get it?? because Calaglia? no? yeah, that one was pretty bad, but there's a realization that turns his wolfish grin a little more sober for all of three seconds. even if he did know that Gladio had gotten into the Good Booze stash he... couldn't ground him. not because he was an adult, but because he was dead. funny how he still hasn't taken the time to actually grieve it in the near-year he's been here in Copalli.

nearly a year.

the thought gets Gladio to reach up and rake a hand through his own hair — grown out and tied into a sloppy half-pony much like what he'd sport ten years down the line — and huffs a quiet laugh. ]</sub>

I don't think he'd mind in the longrun. One? You're eighteen. That's a milestone, and that's when I first got a taste of this. Two? The bullshit we've all been through? The shit you've been through? That's worthy of at least a couple, and I'm pretty sure he'd think the same. You got the heart of an Amicitia. Three?

_{[ a breath, and Gladio brings the grin back. ]}

Since I'm supposed to be the next head of the family one of these days, I say it's okay. Just don't tell your old man 'cuz I don't wanna get turned into a behemoth-skin rug.

[counterattack]

Can't argue with that.

[ Law's expression sobers for just a moment, but then he smiles. At the very least, he can appreciate the idea of found family, seeing as it's all he's really had most of his life. Even when his parents were alive, their little community in Ulzebek and the Crows were as much his extended family as anything else. He's never said anything about it (doesn't have the nerve to, for one thing), but he's already felt like Gladio and his friends are as good as honorary family, too, so this isn't a stretch. ]

Oh, my dad won't mind. There's, uh, no drinking age where I come from or anything, and we've already been here putting away the stuff they serve here before, so...

[ just normal things to do with your dead/estranged dad, play drinking games with engine degreaser. Law crams another few chips in his mouth, thoughtful, and then talks with his mouth full, because he's a dignified and well-raised individual with manners who cares how he comes across around rich people. ]

Just as long as I don't get completely trashed, I guess. Probably goes without saying, but I don't got such good judgment when that happens. Like, at all.

[ what an understatement. ]

—These're really good, by the way. What are they?

[indeferent]

Hey, better than me. I get...

<sub>[ it's Gladio's turn to falter and do his cheeks actually darken? maybe it's just the lighting of Viento's. it's gotta be, right? there's no way that such a little admission could be getting Gladio of all people flustered. for all his bravado and candor with all of that, it's almost funny.

...okay, it's just funny. especially in the way his ears droop a little in his own embarrassment. ]</sub>

It's not bad, just... Y'know.

_{[ an awkward clearing of his throat and Gladio forces his attention to the bag. is it way better to focus on that than admitting that he gets Affectionate™? y e p. ]}

They're potato chips. They don't have 'em where you're from?

[counterattack]

You... what?

[ Yeah, he sees that, and he's flabbergasted. And intrigued. When has Gladio ever looked embarrassed about anything, since he met him? Literally never, as far as he can recall. The guy's pretty much always confident, maybe even downright shameless. It's been a source of inspiration for Law to try and emulate, not that he's done all that great of a job at it so far. He's getting there, but it's never really going to be all that similar to Gladio. Or to Alphen, his dad, or anyone else he looks up to, for that matter. Thing is, he's always had an independent streak about him, and he walks his own path. Can't be anybody but himself, y'know? So he'll learn how to be a horse's ass all on his own time.

In the interim, he'll just be here, fascinated. ]

No, I don't know! You get what? Sloppy? Dumb? I'm pretty sure that's kinda standard... no need to get all embarrassed about it, dude.

[ And here he is, talking with his mouth full again, and then practically spitting them out when he chokes: ]

These are potatoes?! No freakin' way! No—wait, never mind that, don't change the subject! There's a story here, and I wanna hear it.

[indeferent]

<sub>[ for the first time in a long while he's suddenly thankful that the fur covering his ears is too dark to show just how pink he knows they are. they're burning, and when Gladio reaches up to touch his forehead the backs of his knuckles thunk against the curve of his horns and earns a small grimace. he'll pretend he's more embarrassed over that than reality which he's not getting out of anytime soon. no, he knows the kind of determination Law has, and it very nearly reminds him of his own sister — as soon as she sets her sights on something it's damn near impossible to shake her and/or change her mind, and in the months he's known Law? he's come to find that he's eerily similar in that aspect.

six, strike him down right now and save him. ]</sub>

Sloppy? Who do I look like? Blondie?

_{[ sorry not sorry prom, but it's true!! ]}

I don't get dumb, either. I...

_{[ Gladio's face twists up in another half-grimace, half-scowl (which winds up looking more like a pout than anything), and to buy time he grabs the second garula cake that Law had abandoned. time to shove that thing right into his mouth and "manners and upbringing" be damned, he's talking with his own mouth full. ]}

I get... Touchy. Happy?

[counterattack]

[ Law snorts, but still makes a face at that little comment. Excuse you, Prompto is a gentleman and a saint?? But then again, he hasn't ever seen him under the influence of alcohol, either. What secrets is he not privy to here?! Things to find out someday, maybe... but in the meantime, the gossip is all on Gladio today, and wow, he's... really twisted up about this! He doesn't know whether to laugh or just gape at him, so in the end he settles for something kind of in the middle. It's a very "haha, oh man" kind of chuckle. ]

Ohhhhhh. ...O-Oh.

[ Oh.

Touchy.

No, okay, yeah, he's laughing. Laughing is a lot easier than overthinking that and getting all twisted up about it, too, and then potentially running his idiot mouth and saying something really embarrassing. ]

Geez, even I'm not that bad. I just, like, get... competitive, or something? I dunno, I just turn into a daredevil and forget stuff hurts. More than usual, I mean. But you, there's no taking you anywhere.

[ Sure would love to see that, though. Happy, touchy Gladio... astrals, save him. He's too weak for this. He finishes off the last of the chips that'd gotten exploded across the table and then reaches over to nudge Gladio in the arm with his knuckles. ]

Better pace yourself, then, big guy. We're in public.

[ ha ha ha HELP HELP HELP ]

[indeferent]

_{[ this would be the part where his hair would stand on end if he had the mane he often sported while he was out of his gourd, but all he does is stare down at Law's hand against his arm. he can't tell if the touch lingered or not - ultimately it doesn't matter in the end because it gets a reaction either way. a flick of an ear, a hard swallow to go with the barely-there rumble in his chest, and Gladio nudges his hand back with an elbow before Law can properly begin to retreat. Har-dee-har-har. ]}

Yeah, well, I don't have a problem with a little PDA if that's what you're tryin' to get at.

_{[ spoiler alert: Gladio lives for it. little touches to the back, arms slung over shoulders, or even an entire body draped over the other person's back while they're doing something else? great. stealing little touches of affection right in broad daylight? perfection. ]}

'least people don't gotta worry 'bout me running off to one-v-one a Catoblepas just because someone bet me a hundred gold that I couldn't. Am I gonna have to babysit you too?

_{[ another joke because he knows Law can handle himself, and just for added measure he reaches out to grab one chip that Law had missed and... yep, flicks it right at his face. ]}

By the way? You can take me wherever you damn well please.

[counterattack]

What's a Catoblepas, some kinda big zeugle? I bet I could take it one-on-one.

[ he's kidding.......... but also, yeah, that is the exact kind of thing he would do. Hell, he doesn't have to be drunk to do something like that; he'd throw out a "bet I can take that thing" any time, any day, no alcohol required. Maybe a little less often after the events of the last few months—almost dying, actually dying, beating up a god wolf, Copalli almost being completely destroyed, trance, hatching a lot of chicken eggs and somehow surviving The Cluckening—he has at least a modicum of caution when it comes to taking risks that might gamble with his life, but for the most part? Nah, yeah, he's still reckless.

He just probably won't run out half-cocked and try to kill anything on his own today. Like, on his birthday. That'd be pretty messed up. But also fitting? Hmm.

Anyways, check these reflexes: he moves his head and catches that chip in his mouth right out of the air. CRONCH ]

I'm kidding. Nah, I'll be good.

[ He... might have been getting at PDA, yeah, maybe, if not in quite so many words. Instantaneously, Law's lizard brain immediately leaps to exactly all of the places he would be more than happy to take Gladio, drunk or otherwise, and he busies himself with pawing through the pile of junk food to find something new and interesting to snack on to distract himself from that bucket of fish. Listen, how is he supposed to rein it in when the opportunities to flirt are handed to him on a silver platter? The only thing stopping him is his own lack of experience, but that budding seed of confidence along with really growing into his looks is helping to overcome that real damn quick. He's half "high school heartthrob" and half "battle-hardened badass" and he wears it pretty well, if he does say so himself. (He doesn't. He doesn't say that himself. It would kill him to hear himself described that way.) ]

Heh... if we get kicked outta here for being too weird, we'll have to crash at the coterie, y'know. Not sure how much I'd trust a cab to get us anywhere in one piece at that point.

[indeferent]

It might step on you before you get the chance. One of those could keep a Behemoth fed, fat and happy for a week.

<sub>[ a Gladio-sized behemoth or an Actual Size Shown behemoth? the world may never know. what he does know is just how filling the meat is and he has a few moments where he's totally thinking about that brisket and what he'd have to do to find something like that here. ask the statue? go hunting for one? except surely they'd have seen one by now if they were here just like the Adamantoise lurking in the mountains. that's... one animal he's not going to fuck around and find out with. once was enough.

unless???

with Law distracted above the table, Gladio sticks his leg out and knocks his boot against an ankle. a distraction tactic? perhaps, because he's tearing off a little corner of his cake and lobbing it right at his mouth. ]</sub>

Too weird? You've got a tail as long as my arm and I've got two racks. I don't think we can get any weirder than we already are, touchy-feely or not. Buuuuut... If you really wanna sit around with my head in your lap in the lodge, by all means I ain't gonna stop you. Birthday boys make the rules and get all their wishes granted, after all.

_{[ after a few moments of watching Law rummage, he reaches in and lightly tosses another bag his way. Coeurls, Infernian style. were these the ones he warned him about? maybe, maybe not! he'll just have to find out on his own, wont he? it's a good distraction for Gladio too, because for as long as he's known Law he doesn't actually think he ever— ]}

Hn. Come to think of it what do you guys do for birthdays like this back home? Not just regular ones, but the big milestones. Sixteen, eighteen, thirty... anything special?

[counterattack]

[ Law's chin lifts quickly when Gladio nudges him, not immediately recognizing the gesture and thinking he's trying to get his attention, which works out great when there's a little piece of cake flying at his face. Just like the chip, he catches that in his mouth, too, but looks fully like Slow Motion Treat Photography Dog as he does it. Whatever dude, still counts if he catches it. ]

Ah—no, come on! You know what I meant! Besides, from the sound of it, you'd be the one putting your head in my lap, Mr. "Touchy".

[ by all fucking means. actually wait no don't, he can't even think about having to sit still and act normal with Gladio's head in his lap. That is a test of his strength that he will categorically fail, he's sure of it.

The question takes a little of the spice out of his rampantly hormonal thoughts, though to say it causes him any feelings of melancholy is stretching things a bit. Law catches the package, studying it for only as long as it takes to decide, yeah, he has no idea what to assume what the hell this is, then pops the bag open (without exploding it everywhere this time). ]

Well, uh... not that, I can tell you that much. Birthdays and celebrations in general are kinda weird where I come from, so we don't have that many traditions. You're just... lucky to make it to those ages at all, is the thing.

[ no. no downers. Law plucks out one of those skinny red looking snack things but doesn't pop it in his mouth just yet. ]

Where I was born, in Calaglia, we'd do something really special for people who turned sixteen, since that's when you could officially start being considered an adult. I wasn't around for that myself, but I celebrated some other people's birthdays like that. The whole village would save up all their food and we'd get together to eat and sing songs around the fire at night, so long as there weren't any guards around.

[ That's it. That's the "really special", just... save up all your food, eat, sing around a fire. It's stupidly simple, but he's gotten used to feeling that way when he talks to people from other worlds since arriving to this one. Despite living here for over a year now, he's said very little about his home to very few people just because of how keenly aware he is of the difference between how he grew up and how most of them did. In this case, though, it's a happy memory. He can't help feeling a little squeeze in his chest, thinking about his parents dancing with each other beside the fire during some of the other Crows' birthdays. Stupidly simple, but it was one of the happiest times of his life. ]

And in Cyslodia, where I was living when I turned sixteen, uh... haha...

[ okay, yeah, "no downers" isn't going to fly here if he keeps going. Law clenches the teeth at the back of his jaw when he smiles, forced and awkward.]

Let's just say... they do stuff there, but I didn't celebrate any of those birthdays myself, so I wouldn't really know. We're... kinda hard-up for fun on Dahna, sorry. What about in Eos? What's it like?

[ and there goes the hot coeurl. countdown until he loses his shit from the spice. ]